50 replies to this topic

[Director_Maiha]

ahh~! i love it! X3 poor koharu though. (i_i) i know how she feels! and aika has feelings for a member??!! *gasps and faints* i can't wait! ganbatte!~

*fan you crazily* You can't faint now, or else you won't be able to see the next chapter.

[Koushin]

Chapter four

"So what was the reason you took me out for lunch? This kinda thing doesn't happen often," I said cheekily, folding my arms.

Risa smiled, leaning back against her chair to sigh. We were in a cute little tea shop in inner Tokyo - I wasn't fond of these sorts of places, but they sure did have nice teacups. I wondered vaguely whether they were very expensive. Then I wondered whether it was actually expensive here. I'm sure it probably was, and it was very nice for Risa to treat me like this - and she had said it so airily, too! - but really... there was no need for it. Did she want something from me? It wasn't often that the other members socialised with me often.

But... well, Risa wasn't like them. The others were just normal girls. But Risa was nicer. It seemed the older members from previous generations were so much more friendly. I wish Yossie had stayed in longer. I can still remember when she announced it to us like it was yesterday, and I could still hear everyone's outbursts, my own breath catching in my throat. She looked at all of us with a big grin, seeing what our reactions were - 'Aww, don't look too sad, kid. I'll still be around... might go into acting,' she had said to me, once she caught sight of my stunned, wide-eyed expression. I couldn't even say anything.

Kid. She never saw me as anything more than a kid sister.

"You looked like you had something on your mind," Risa said, breaking into my thoughts - ironically. I shrugged questioningly, wondering what she was getting at. Something on my mind? "You were being nice to Koharu yesterday. I appreciate it."
I blinked, looking at her round, pretty face in bewilderment. Appreciate...?
"Ah... I probably sound like her mother or something," she said, lifting her hand to her mouth, giggling lightly. "But you know what's happening in the spring." Of course... Ai's graduation would bring around something else. Risa would become the new leader. "I have to look out for everyone, don't I?"
"I guess so... but the others..."
"I know."
"I thought I should try to put a stop to it, y'know? It seemed like it was affecting her yesterday."
"Are you sure? Koharu never noticed before."
"Never noticed?"

At this Risa brought her tea to her lips, not looking down into her cup like I would expect her to, but fixing her gentle, piercing eyes onto my face instead, never leaving it. It looked like she was trying to dig down into my inner thoughts - like she was looking through me. I fought back a shudder; she always seemed to know what I was thinking, too. "I think it's more of a case of... her not mentioning it," she said quietly. Could Koharu really just be ignoring it all, I wondered... was she stronger than I thought?

"But she seems so..."
"Stupid? Slow?"
"N-no! Of course not! How could you say such a thing," I objected, my voice firm. I didn't understand why she was talking about Koharu at all.
"You think differently from the others," Risa said with another sigh, looking at the ceiling, ignoring my outburst. "Maybe it's because you're normal. Sane!" she added with a slight laugh, shaking her head in exasperation. I wondered inwardly whether Risa would be able to control us. Yossie had all our attention and respect, there hadn't been anyone who didn't like her.

There probably hadn't been anyone who liked her as much as me, though!

"Nah. They're the normal ones. I'm just... slightly less normal." Risa really did laugh then, and I relaxed, glad to see her looking happy.
"So... what was making Koharu so upset yesterday?" she asked, suddenly looking serious. She really did care.
"I'm not sure. She did tell me something before, that she go-" Oops. My hand shot up to my mouth, flat, my eyes wide - and Risa raised her eyebrow. "I wasn't supposed to say that! It's a secret. I'm not supposed to tell anyone.
"Would you like to?"
"Yes! I hate keeping secrets!" I said, throwing my hands forward to make her understand just how much! I did tell Koharu I wouldn't tell anyone, though... and just remembering her hopeful, trusting face made me feel guilty. "You won't tell anyone, will you? I...if I told you, say."
"You can trust me," Risa said. I looked up at her genuine, caring smile, and believed her.
"Alright. She said... she said she got a..." I paused, looking around the tea shop. "A b-o-y-f..." Risa's eyes widened, and I made loud shushing noises.
"Oh, Aika, there won't be any paparazzi in here," she said, although she did look very worried.
"It's not good, huh?" I said, frowning.
"You know what's happened before. Yaguchi Mari-san - you remember her?"
"I've met her before. Second generation? Or was it third?"
"Third just had one person! Honestly, your memory is terrible." I stuck out my tongue at her, and she giggled again. Then her face went back to Ultra Serious mode.
"Is it really that bad, having a boyfriend? I... I think she'll be careful..."
"But you don't know that for sure. What if something happens?"
"She won't go waltzing around with him! I... uh... think..."
"You know how careless she can be. This is a boyfriend!"
"I know, isn't it weird? I mean, Koharu!"
"Keep to the subject," Risa snapped, and I blinked. "This is serious. You can't tell anybody else. You haven't already, have you!?"
"No! Of course not. You know how much of a blabbermouth Sayumi and Eri can be, and-"
"Good. I'll have to talk to Koharu about it, you know..."
"No! She'll know I told you!"
"Better me than Ai or Reina doing it!"

I stared back at her defiantly, but she held my gaze with the same expression, hands flat on the table for emphasis. Our fingertips almost touching, the table was so small and compact. And she looked...

So much like Yossie. At this exact moment, anyway. Ever since she had gotten her hair cut short - perhaps it was a leader thing, Ai wanted to grow hers long again once she left, anyway - she looked a little like her. A little. But she could darn well act like her sometimes!

"Aika?"
I realised I'd been staring at her too hard. And my eyes were too wide. And my fingernails were digging into the wood.
...maybe I should get a boyfriend. It had to be all the feminine aura around our group that made me so... um... affectionate towards other girls? I suppose it was natural, though. I mean if I were the only girl in a big group of boys, with a strict order of dating nobody else outside the group - who would I go for? Who would anyone go for? You guessed it!

...it totally wasn't me just being weird! I'm sure there are other members... other past members... maybe one in particular... nah, Yossie was too much of a tomboy. She had to like boys to like a boyish style, or... something.

"Uh... Aika? What's the matter?"
"Hmm?"
"You haven't spoken for about two minutes. Am I that cute?" she added, grinning mock-sweetly, doing a cute hair flick.
"Don't," I said, put off, frowning. "That isn't like you."
"But guys like the cute type," she said.
"Since when have you been the guy-getter anyway?" I demanded. I hoped it wasn't Risa's new upcoming responsibility that made her want to be so... well, like a normal idol girl is supposed to be! Like Sayumi. I mean, no offence or anything, but we all know she's never been the best vocalist in the group. And yet she has loads of fans because of that cutesy style. No wonder Koharu got forced with it too, and all that Kirarin stuff. Becoming so successful because of her cutesy style.
"We are so off-topic," Risa joked, although she seemed uncomfortable. Her hands were back on her lap. Geez, I didn't mean it. She didn't have a boyfriend too, did she!? Detective Aika strikes again... I didn't want to uncover any more secrets.
"It's getting late anyway. I should have been home a while ago."
"You didn't call your house," Risa asked, her hand on my shoulder as I got to my feet, looking concerned. I suddenly felt embarrassed by her touch.
"No need to worry, my mother won't mind too much," I mumbled, getting my bag. Risa was getting to her feet as well, so suddenly thankful that she had offered to pay, I called out, 'Thanks for the meal, it was very nice of you!', ducked around somebody and headed out the door fast.
"Aika?" Risa called after me, surprised, but I didn't turn back. I really needed to get home, after all...

It was totally not because I recognised what these feelings were. And it wasn't fair on Risa, just because she reminded me of, er, someone.

- - -

Sorry it was so overdue. ; This wasn't all I wanted to put in this chapter, but it's big enough, so... here you go. :/
Chapter five will be much more eventful.

Chapter five ~~ Koharu's secret gets out to the rest of Morning Musume! But who let it out?

[KaPouk]

Awesome chapter, I want to read more
>_<
Aika Why did you say the secret of koharu???? Even if you say it to Risa.

Chapter five ~~ Koharu's secret gets out to the rest of Morning Musume! But who let it out?[/b]

Can't wait to know who let it out >_<
Keep your work, Ganbatte

[Director_Maiha]

Woot, another awesome chapter. I can't wait for the next!~

[Glasseyelashes]

i always found these sorts of things to be silly and never believable, but your story is so different. i said it before, but it really is. i don't usually re-read them either, but i find myself re-reading yours, it's that good.

i really do look forward to seeing what happens next. you've left such a good cliffhanger with this chapter.

[Pomber]

tis good so far. hope to read more.
also please check out mine.....

[shiro_reina]

i hope it's not reality, poor koharu chan

[Koushin]

Chapter five

The next day as I travelled to work, I did a lot of thinking in that small, tight taxi. I would not let any feelings at all for Risa get in the way. It was stupid. It was a tiny, tiny little crush. And there was no way I was actually going to TELL her about it... nobody would ever convince me otherwise. And nobody would ever be able to anyway, because I wasn't going to tell them! It was simple. I had tried to forget all about it when I got inside, and my mum never noticed a thing. I was even good at hiding it!

"Is there something wrong, miss?" the driver asked from the front. Crap! Had it been that obvious? When I looked up I saw him shooting me concerned glances through the mirror.
"No, I'm fine," I replied, smiling unconvincingly.
"You look like you're about to be sick," he said uneasily, then chortled. "Please don't be sick inside my taxi, alright?"

I grinned apologetically back, looking outside my window, starting to feel irritated by myself. I had to stop this now.

***

It didn't seem I had anything to worry about, though. My attention was completely grabbed by something else.
Something not good.

As usual, I wasn't exactly one of the earliest to arrive. No matter how early I got up, I just never seemed to be perfectly on time. But it was alright, two minutes after seven, there wasn't any problem. Once I took off my coat and hung it up, I opened the door, greeting everyone with a grin and, 'Shitsurei shimasu!'

After that, though, my smile faded. Everyone - I'd been right, I was last in - was standing up, but they were in smaller groups. It wasn't that unusual. Eri and Sayumi were together as usual, probably in the middle of gossiping about some fallen celebrity relationship... Reina and Ai were close together - no doubt Reina was still sucking up to her, trying to influence the choice of the new sub-leader after her departure - and Risa was very slightly apart from them...

And in the far corner standing alone was Koharu, looking as if she were about to cry.

I won't forget that face for a long time.

"M-morning, everyone..." I muttered, trying to break the uncomfortable, almost accusing, silence. But those accusing waves were only coming from Koharu's direction, I could see Eri smiling brightly at me, then hesitating as she looked at Koharu's face. Then Reina came up to me, with a face practically plastered with triumph.
"You haven't heard, then!?" she demanded.
"Heard what?"
"Koharu's got a boyfriend! I can't believe this!" she added, turning to Sayumi with a scandalous expression, one I'm sure had been practised by all of them for a long time. Sayumi followed suit, and Eri looked like she wanted to say something, but Reina turned back to be and went on casually, "We were all just wondering how long it will take before she's out. I wonder if the press has got hold of any pictures yet? Koharu's so dopey, I bet she's been all over the city with him, haha..."

At that moment Koharu ran forward, flung open the door and left. We heard her footsteps ring noisily along the floor of the building, and heard a door somewhere slam. Another uncomfortable silence followed.

My shoulders were practically shaking. Reina had gone back to sit with Ai, and the two of them started chatting with Eri and Sayumi, while Risa sat near them but hung back. I looked at her, eyes blazing - I could definitely imagine fire shooting out of them right now - but she wasn't looking at me. I got the feeling she was purposefully avoiding my gaze.

I was about to ask her for a word when I realised there was a more pressing matter to attend to - Koharu. So I opened the door again, which had now fallen back into place from Koharu's force, and tentatively made my way outside into the hallway.

There was no mistaking it. Risa must have told everyone. What a sickening thing to do! Fickle as I was, I began to doubt whether she was a decent person or not. And I had actually thought I had feelings for her! How could anyone do that?

...it seemed rather unlikely though. I know there wasn't really any other explanation... I was reading the paper this morning, and there was nothing in the tabloids either, no pictures of Koharu, and I knew one of them would have a picture of Koharu and her boyfriend or whatever if there was one. It seemed like Morning Musume were the only ones that knew. What about Tsunku, UFA...? Oh. Crap. This was really bad.

And I remembered the way Koharu had looked at me as I came in. Eyes full of betrayal and hurt. I felt so guilty... how could I have told Risa like that!? I shouldn't have trusted anyone at all! I remembered what she had said... don't tell anyone, okay? Looking so hopeful. And how happy she had seemed after I assured her I wouldn't.

Japan's biggest idiot = me.

Maybe I could get to her and apologise. Would she accept my apology, though? I had to at least try...

I found her in the toilets, sitting on top of the sinks. She looked like she had just stopped crying, but she didn't look surprised to see me there - I guess she'd heard me coming. "Hey... uh... are you okay?"
"Do I look okay?" she retorted glumly. From anyone else it would have sounded menacing, but Koharu just sounded... sad. I felt a fresh wave of guilt.
"I can't believe everyone knows about Kazuhiko-kun..."
"Kazuhiko... uh... he's your boyfriend, then?" Koharu nodded. I jumped up backwards onto the sinks beside her, wondering why she hadn't slapped me like a normal person would have. Or kicked me... hit me... all of the above. And she was on first name terms with this guy! I wondered bizarrely whether they were serious or something. I had never imagined Koharu to have a boyfriend. I didn't mean it in a weird way, but... Koharu, seriously...
"It's okay that you told Risa," she said, sniffing. "I don't really mind. I suppose I wouldn't have kept in a secret either..."
"Koharu... I'm really sorry. I can't believe I was so stupid. I... I didn't think Risa..."
"It's alright, I understand," she said, although she sounded... a bit stiff. I looked over at her rigid posture and swallowed.

But when I opened my mouth to say something, she went on, "It was nice knowing you. I tried to get on with people here but I guess I'm too much of a normal high school girl to stay in the showbiz world too long," she said, trailing away, her voice weak and hopeless.
"What! Koharu, you won't get kicked out! I'm pretty sure they don't know anything about it yet. You haven't been doing anything fishy in public... have you?"
"No! No, I haven't done anything like that!" she protested, looking at me desperately with her hands clasped together. I blinked in surrpise, grinning sheepishly.
"Okay, okay... I was just... wondering. You know it's bad to be seen in public. You know what's happened before."
"I know. I... understand. I've been careful. He only comes to my house, and we-"
"Whoa, okay, no need to hear the details," I cut in, only half-joking. It was weird enough knowing that Koharu actually had a boyfriend...
"What? Mittsi, are you jealous?" Koharu asked, looking at me with big, wide innocent eyes, her head tilted questioningly.

Okay... so that caught me off guard. I gaped at her for a second gormlessly, until Koharu giggled nervously. "I was just joking. Never mind. It doesn't matter."
"You sound like a manga character," I said, raising my eyebrows and folding my arms. She laughed again, and I joined in then.

I know she was only kidding, but Koharu looked... somewhat disappointed. She was a good actress... maybe - if she didn't get kicked out - she would go into acting after she graduated! I'm sure she would be successful.

"Hey, Koharu?" I said suddenly. "I'm gonna help you, okay? I won't let you get kicked out! We'll find out if they know about you and... Kazuhiko yet... and I'll protect you, yeah?"
I won't forget the look Koharu had given me earlier, and I won't forget the one she gave me now as she turned towards me.
"Thank you, Aika-san!"
"There's no need for that! I'm just Aika. You've called me Mittsi before!" I said, mock-pouting. Koharu burst into another fit of giggles.

I was glad she had forgiven me. Granted it had happened... a little too easily... but I suppose she was just a wonderful person like that.

- - -

Thanks for your comments people!

In chapter six: Aika corners Risa... Tsunku comes in with an announcement... and Koharu doesn't turn up for work...

[Director_Maiha]

Wow. Really nice job! I had a few doubts when I first read this fanfiction, but I can't wait to read more now! I'm glad that more ppl are writing nowadays. I wonder of Risa told the group for a reason or something..

[Glasseyelashes]

i agree. though i didn't have doubts when i first read this one, i knew it'd be a good one. i am glad, however, that more people are posting fanfics on here now. i have one planned as well, sadly i have to post 100 comments before i can post my own fanfic. if you ask me, it's a bit unfair, maybe 25, or mayyybe 50 posts, but 100? that's going a bit far. grr!!

[kawaii beam!]

gya!~ loved this chap! i wonder wat the big bosmans announcment is??

[kelsey]

MORE MORE MORE!

[Director_Maiha]

i agree. though i didn't have doubts when i first read this one, i knew it'd be a good one. i am glad, however, that more people are posting fanfics on here now. i have one planned as well, sadly i have to post 100 comments before i can post my own fanfic. if you ask me, it's a bit unfair, maybe 25, or mayyybe 50 posts, but 100? that's going a bit far. grr!!

I know, I was thinking of posting Love's Fate. But I couldn't till I reached my 100 posts goal. And now that I did, I'm pretty happy. Ahaha.

[Makocchan]

ASDFGHJKL
more please ~ i love this

[shiro_reina]

yep... another great chapter....

[kelsey]

we need more!

[yupshezeducated]

comes out of lurking

This is my first fanfic with Aika as the lead.... was hesitant but this was AWESOME

lurks

[kelsey]

more more more!!!
motto motto motto!!!

[Tricia]

BRAVO!! I really like this so far!! Can't wait to read more!

[Koushin]

I felt really guilty for not posting a chapter soon enough, so I pulled this together today.
It's just a short one. The big chapter is coming later today!

- - -

Chapter six ~*~

After talking to Koharu, our friendship seemed to be at all all-time high. She was able to ignore all the whispering and quiet jibing that some of the others gave, and she seemed so happy and oblivious that I grew happy as well. I say oblivious - it did seem again that she didn't even hear what the others were saying. We learn lyrics in a huge classroom-like area, sitting on separate desks. I think the school-like atmosphere they provide for us really does help, it's probably the best way to learn, when you're able to turn around to your peers - in this case our fellow Musume - and talk. Of course, we take the lyrics home to learn as well, but it's generally a happy affair at work. Learning lyrics for new singles is probably one of my favourite parts of being a member of Morning Musume.

Usually - like now - Tsunku goes through with it first, to try and help us get the feel of the single. When he strode in today I was almost shaking with nervousness, and even Koharu looked a little pale at what could be the end of her career. But he didn't say anything at all, which meant he obviously hadn't heard about Kazuhiko and all that yet. I was amazingly relieved. I was pretty sure that nobody but Reina could actually let it 'slip' to him, and even she had a heart... well, she had her moments. Sometimes. But even so, I was still anxious.

If anything though, he seemed more cheerful towards Koharu than usual. Probably because of the high sales her latest single had received. Her Kirarin work was still going on, and Koharu was as popular as ever. I couldn't bear looking behind me at the others, because I knew Reina would look scornful, and even Ai would look annoyed - I suppose I couldn't blame her, Ai had the best voice of all of us, and was our leader... and it's basically a given that she won't even get as much sales as Koharu once she leaves. Normally I wouldn't bother myself to think about Koharu's Kirarin stuff - it didn't involve me - but as Tsunku chatted casually to her about it while everything was getting set up, she looked so relieved and energetic that afterwards I shot her the most enthusiastic grin I could muster. She grinned back, face lit up with happiness from Tsunku's praise.

Throughout the lyrics-learning, I could hear Reina's gossiping about Koharu to Sayumi and Ai very clearly, but it seemed that Koharu was too involved in paying attention to learning the lyrics than listening to them. Honestly, that girl was such a ditz. I could hear them perfectly well! Was she deaf? Every so often she did look behind her and Reina's head shot up to see if she'd received a reaction yet, but all Koharu was doing was scanning the room for me, giving me the occasional grin. I grinned back with one eyebrow raised. It seemed in the group, she had eyes only for me. I suppose that was a good thing, seeing as I was pretty much the only person who actually had any sense of liking her in the slightest. I guess her dopeyness was sometimes a good thing...

After a few hours, it was time to go. I got to my feet, stretching and yawning while holding my lyrics - I nearly knew them off-by-heart, it would just take scanning them every morning for a few days for them to work, and then I'd be ready for first rehearsal next week.

I was about to head out the door - I'm ashamed to admit fast enough so that Koharu couldn't run up and latch onto me - but then I got an idea. A very clever idea indeed...

Shifting to the side, I watched the others leaving, watching for someone in particular. Koharu surfaced about the same time she did, and grinned as she spotted me. She looked so happy, probably thinking I was waiting for her, that I felt horrible for not actually intending that. But I had something to do. "Risa-chan, can I have a word?" I asked, and Risa turned, surprised. Koharu's face fell a little, so I said, "I'll meet you outside, yeah?" and she grinned, nodded low and then followed the others.

"Phew," I said, feigning exhaustion as if Koharu was a particularly exuberant dog. Risa laughed, but looked expectant, clearly wondering what I was after. My expression hardened, and I drew up to my full height - just a little bit higher than her, haha! "Never mind that," I muttered coldly. "Why did you tell everyone about Koharu's boyfriend?"

Now Risa blinked, and I hesitated a little bit. I was expecting her maybe to look guilty, maybe even apologise. No, wait, BEG for forgiveness! But she looked completely surprised.
"I didn't tell them," she said, furrowing her eyebrows. "I thought you did?"
"Of course I didn't!" I exclaimed - was she a nutcase? "Why on earth would I do that?"
"Well, I didn't. I really didn't."
"...oh yeah? Then who did, eh?" I said, collecting myself. She wasn't going to trick me this easily. But looking at her pretty, open face, so adamant, I gave in a little. She couldn't be lying. This was Risa, not... Reina or something. Risa wouldn't lie to me.
"Did you tell anybody else?"
"No, of course not. I only told you. Koharu thought I did it."
"She didn't seem to be very angry. She seemed happier today in any case."
"Not angry any more," I corrected with a grin, although to be fair she hadn't exactly blown her top like I would have done in her situation. "I guess it doesn't really matter anyway. You don't think anyone will... go and tell Sensei or anything, do you?"
"No. I don't think so. I'll have a word with them just in case.
"Okay. Thanks, by the way. I'm sorry I accused you," I said, although I still had no idea what had happened to get the secret loose.
"Don't worry about it. I can see why you thought it was me - but I really didn't do it," she said, now holding her hands together for emphasis. Her eyes looked so pleading, all my suspicions were washed away. Risa would never do that, I was sure of it. Then her eyes widened as she seemed to remember something: "By the way, do you want to meet me for lunch on Saturday? Eri and Sayumi are coming."
"Sure!" I said. It was always nice to go out for lunch with Risa. Even if Eri and Sayumi would be there too... at least there wouldn't be any awkward silences with THOSE chatterboxes around.
"Okay! I'll call you about it, okay?"

And with that, she waved goodbye cheerfully and made her own exit. Well, that was all sorted out. The worrying weight didn't seem to have lifted from my chest, though. I still felt nervous about the fact that the secret was still there. Maybe I would have another word with Koharu about being careful - maybe I'd go and meet her boyfriend, too. Make sure he knew all the risks. Make sure he wasn't dating her because she was famous or something... the usual.

Seriously, as I thought, making my way outside to meet the particularly exuberant dog called Koharu. This is way more trouble than it's worth.