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Still, I Love You
Chapter 1
I never expected to fall in love with you.
It just kind of … happened.
I thought my future in love would be ideal.
I’d fall in love with the perfect guy, and get married and have 2.4 children and live life as a housewife. Every day, you’d come home and we would be perfect and loving. Every day would be perfect.
That was a young girl’s naiveté. Life isn’t a shoujou manga, I suppose.
After that happened, I realized …
Nothing in this world is ideal.
Nothing in this world is perfect.
Even so … I still love you.
***
“Tokyo’s skyline is always so pretty, isn’t it?” The words rang out in my empty apartment.
I was talking to myself again…
I should call you and ask you what you are doing. I always like to hear your voice, its cheer never failing to lift my spirits and make me feel on top of the world.
Snatching up my cell phone from the kitchen counter, my fingers quickly traced their route over the well-worn keypad. As I grasped the rhinestone encrusted plastic, I wondered how you would respond.
“Hello?”
“Hi!” You sounded a little out of breath, but I thought nothing of it. I was glad to hear your voice, speaking to me and only me. Or so I had thought.
I laugh at how foolish I was that day.
“What are you doing?”
“Wait one second…” You put the phone down, although I could still make out what you were saying. ‘Not now … I’m on the phone! Wait!’ You mumbled to the person beside you in a hushed tone.
“Are you busy? I could call back later …” I heard laughter in the background. Had I called at a bad time, intruding on your time? Would you tell me to hang up, choosing your unknown visitor over me? My chest tightened as the thought ran through my mind. You were supposed to be my best friend …
“No, its fine.” You sound distant, like I don’t have all of your attention.
“If you say so … I’m really bored. Did you want to go for ice cream or something like that?” I hoped you would accept my request, you seemed a little distant from me recently.
“Ah…” You let out a soft moan and I almost dropped the phone on the kitchen floor, in my surprise. “I think … now’s not a good time. I’m a little pre…occupied.”
“Oh …” I bit my lip to keep a possessive statement behind my lips. “That’s okay then, another time?”
“Yeah … sorry.” You didn’t sound sorry at all. Did you just want me off of the phone?
“It’s alright.” I should let you be happy, I suppose …
Before you could reply, a deeper and rougher voice sounded from the speaker. “Sorry, she’s a little busy right now. Maybe you could call back later? Thanks.” The phone beeped to signal the end of the call.
The plastic mobile device clattered to the floor. You had never done something like that to me before … It hurt.
Am I just an annoyance to you? Someone that’s always just … conveniently there?
You broke my heart, that day. Even so … I still love you.
